As he grew, his parents became
concerned about this personality flaw, and pondered long and hard about what
they should do. Finally, the father had an idea. And he struck a bargain with
his son. He gave him a bag of nails, and a BIG hammer. “Whenever you lose your
temper,” he told the boy, “I want you to really let it out. Just take a nail
and drive it into the oak boards of that old fence out back. Hit that nail as
hard as you can!”
Of course, those weathered oak
boards in that old fence were almost as tough as iron, and the hammer was
mighty heavy, so it wasn’t nearly as easy as it first sounded. Nevertheless, by
the end of the first day, the boy had driven 37 nails into the fence (That was one angry young man!).
Gradually, over a period of weeks, the number dwindled down. Holding his temper
proved to be easier than driving nails into the fence! Finally the day came
when the boy didn’t lose his temper at all. He felt mighty proud as he told his
parents about that accomplishment.
“As a sign of your success,”
his father responded, “you get to PULL OUT one nail. In fact, you can do that
each day that you don’t lose your temper even once.”
Well, many weeks passed.
Finally one day the young boy was able to report proudly that all the nails
were gone. At that point, the father asked
his son to walk out back with him and take one more good look at the fence.
“You have done well, my son,” he said. “But
I want you to notice the holes that are left. No matter what happens from now
on, this fence will never be the same. Saying or doing hurtful things in anger
produces the same kind of result. There will always be a scar. It won’t matter
how many times you say you’re sorry, or how many years pass, the scar will
still be there. And a verbal wound is as
bad as a physical one. People are much more valuable than an old fence. They
make us smile. They help us succeed. Some will even become friends who share
our joys, and support us through bad times. And, if they trust us, they will
also open their hearts to us. That means we need to treat everyone with
love and respect. We need to prevent as many of those scars as we can.”
A most valuable lesson learned. Everyone gets angry occasionally. The real test is what we DO or how we react when we are angry. If we are wise, we will spend our time building bridges rather than barriers in our relationship. This story is probably not new and you might have read or heard it before. But everytime when you read this it brings a fresh perspective and each time reminds us the side effects of not keeping our anger in control.
